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If you've ever been fired, you're in good company That's what actress and writer Annabelle Gurwitch discovered when she was fired by her idol Woody Allen ("You look retarded"). She confided her tale of woe to her friend Felicity Huffman, who made Annabelle laugh with her own stories. Annabelle realized that there was a world of people out there waiting to laugh at the experience that virtually everyone shares, and she began to collect stories of being fired from friends and colleagues. Soon she was contributing regular "Fired!" segments to Day to Day on NPR and gathering friends to appear with her in sold-out performances of Fired! in Los Angeles and New York. Fired!, her documentary film inspired by these stories, comes out in 2006.

This book is a collection of hilarious but true tales from people who've all gotten the ax, the boot, or been canned at some point in their lives. In "That's a Fact," Andy Borowitz tells the story of being fired as a writer for the television sitcom The Facts of Life after being informed that he just didn't "get" Tootie. "Take that hanger off your head, you idiot!" were the last words Jeff Garlin heard before being fired from Spec's Music store after only one day on the job, just one of the many firings he recounts in "That Garlin Boy." In "Jimmy the Idiot," Dana Gould sums up his firing from the cast of the sitcom Working that led him to become a producer of The Simpsons: "In the second episode, I was a math genius, in the third -- a motocross racer, and in the fourth episode I was replaced by a chimp, but nobody noticed." In "Poor Judgment," Illeana Douglas tells about being fired after a few hours of working as a coat check girl: "How is it possible to be fired from hanging coats? I have arms. I know what coats are. I don't come home and throw my coat on the floor. I hang it in a closet. I have experience." How did Bob Saget find out he was being phased out of his job on The Morning Program? "One day I showed up and my hosting chair was gone!"

With an all-star cast from Tim Allen to Morgan Spurlock, from Anne Meara to David Cross, and contributions from people from all over the country, this book proves it's not the bounce that counts, it's the bounce back..
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If you've ever been fired, you're in good company That's what actress and writer Annabelle Gurwitch discovered when she was fired by her idol Woody Allen, who added, "You look retarded " In confiding her tale of woe to others, she realized there is a world of people out there with similar laugh-out-loud experiences. How did Bob Saget learn he was being phased out of his job on The Morning Program? "One day I showed up and my hosting chair was gone!"

A collection of anecdotes from people who've all gotten the ax, the boot, or been canned at some point in their lives, Fired! boasts an all-star cast from Tim Allen to Jeff Garlin and features contributions from people all over the country. Uproariously funny and refreshingly true, this book proves it's not the bounce that counts, it's the bounce back.

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Evan Tanner ran head-first into a piece of shrapnel in Korea, and now he can't sleep. Ever. Which can be an asset for a dedicated linguist, term paper forger, thief, lost cause enthusiast . . .

Spy.

Tanner takes on jobs for a covert intelligence organization so secret that even those who work for it have no idea who they're working for. Now his nameless supervisor wants him to sneak behind the Iron Curtain, storm an impregnable castle in Prague (alone!), and rescue an old Slovak who's got a pressing date with a hangman's noose.

The trouble is the prisoner is an unrepentant Nazi who makes Goering look like Mister Rogers. Tanner hates Nazis. If he's caught (which is likely) the U.S. will deny that they know him. And Tanner will be executed. After being tortured, no doubt. All in all, there are many excellent reasons why Tanner should refuse this assignment.

So, naturally, he says yes.

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"It's not against any religion to want to dispose of a pigeon." (Tom Lehrer, from "Poisoning Pigeons in the Park") "They're rats with wings." (Woody Allen, from Stardust Memories); No one is certain when pigeon-loathing began, but the anti-pigeon phenomenon has by now insinuated itself into every medium of popular culture. Whether in film, television, music, or advertising, pigeon eradication has become an accepted way to tug at a person's funny bone. With Canceled Flight: 101 Tried and True Pigeon Killin' Methods, A.V. Jones has created an Anarchist Cookbook of comic relief for the worldwide pigeon-hating population. Conjured from Jones' twisted brain, 101 surefire methods for speeding a pigeon's journey to the grave are laid out for even the novice pigeon-despiser with lists of required materials and step-by-step guidelines. Every method has been brilliantly illustrated with the help of more than eighty-five of today's hottest street-inspired painters, illustrators, designers, and photographers. Whether visualized in the pre- or post-death stages or at termination, each piece faithfully represents Jones' methodology with incredible energy and originality—in "The Butcher," a Dalek Space Monkey picks up a cleaver to "chop, chop, chop till he can't chop no more," and Cody Hudson's "The Permanent Press" illustrates how two scorching hot irons can make a toasty pigeon sandwich in no time flat. An exhaustive compilation of execution, Canceled Flight is sure to provide the pigeon-killing technique perfect for you..
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Cecilia Sentenell has been chosen by the reputed rake, the Earl of Arandale to be his bride. But Cecilia has other plans for her life and they don't include Arandale, much to her father's chagrin Cecilia got a bad impression of Arandale when she saw him with his mistress in the park. The rejection causes havoc in the earl's life. The Earl of Arandale rejected by someone he considers insignificant! But dangerous schemes are soon to affect Cecilia's life in other ways. Her father's heir, Alex Shackel, has developed a sinister plan to force Cecilia to become his bride..
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